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Monday, February 13, 2012

On the Possibilty of Weaning {Gentle Thoughts Needed}

Despite the fact that I am a big supporter of extended breastfeeding and letting my girls decide when to wean. Despite the fact that I let Zoelle self wean at 2 years, 8 months, and 8 days. Despite the fact that I adore when one of my girlies falls asleep nursing. Despite that tandem nursing has allowed me to nurse our little Xio even though she didn't come from my belly.

Despite all that...

I. am. ready. to. be. done.

Or at least just down to one.

Honestly, I wish our little Mer would wean. The girl who I seriously wondered if she would make it to a year nursing, is still going strong morning, before nap, and at bedtime.


Sometimes I love it. Sometimes I hate it and just wish she would "forget" for one of the sessions. Instead, I feel like she is wanting to nurse even more often now. I'm considering something I never thought I would do.

Weaning her.

Or at least gently pushing her in that direction. But, I need tips!! I have no idea where to start or how to convince her to go that way. I remember feeling this way with Zoelle right around this time, but she stopped on her own.

I do want it to be gentle. If I thought she was too attached to it, I would not consider it. I feel like she is just doing it for something to do and not really to nurse or even really snuggle. It almost has become a game for her.


It just has become not fun, relaxing, or bonding for me with her. Quite honestly, sometimes I feel stressed at the thought of nursing her again. I really don't want to end on a bad note, but rather would love to remember those good nursing memories. Secretly, I also hope that weaning one girl will help me lose a bit of weight that I cannot seem to lose while nursing so much!

So go gentle on me here and offer me loving advice and tips please!! I do not take this decision lightly.

10 comments:

  1. I really have no strong advice. I quit offering it to my boys and they never even asked for it again. I got off rather easy. Is she asking for it? If you haven't stop offering it, I would start there. Just don't offer it. If you have stopped offering and she is still asking maybe gently guide her by saying that she can hav esomething else, a lovie or cup of juice of something like that? Start slow with weaning just 1 nursing a day for a few days, not sure I'd go cold turkey on all 3 nursings though.

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    1. Yeah, she asks for it non-stop. More so lately than normal. I don't offer and I am gently trying to set limits with her that we nurse one time in the morning, one time before nap, one time before bed. Then I hope to cut down from there. But I know, even setting the limit of one time is hard for her to accept. She really loves it lately!! :(

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  2. I did don't offer, don't refuse. It worked too well. He was done within a few weeks. I'd just try distraction at this point. Offer a cup, play time, cereal, snuggles, etc. and see if it distracts her.

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    1. I seemingly have tried everything to distract her, even gum (which is her favorite) but she doesn't really want it. I've been doing don't offer/don't refuse, but she still seems to want it all the time. More now than she used to.

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  3. I agree with these ladies. :) I had one where I felt as you do with Meridian. I was also pregnant with the next baby and I was feeling crummy. I stopped offering when he woke up and just went right to the table for breakfast and a cup of something to drink. I kept the evening nursing for a week or two and then stopped offering that. It was a seamless transition. It was a "gentle nudge" instead of declaring he was "done."

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    1. I think the hardest will be to cut out the morning feeding because she loves to nurse in the morning. I'm hoping to work on the nap first but so far it is far from gentle because she seems absolutely devastated when I tell her no! :(

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  4. I want to write you on this- hopefully in the next day or so. :-) No particular advice....just some encouragement and a little bit from our journey- which is, granted, shorter than yours, since Vivi's only 18 months. But I can so relate to the "nursing aversion" issues, and I know I've been encouraged when others share their struggles, so I thought you might be, too.

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    1. Totally does encourage me to know that I am not alone in this!! Thank you Brianna!! :)

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  5. I am in a similar situation, nursing my daughter for 2 years, 10 months and her baby brother for 8.5 months so far. She only nurses twice a day, but often asks much more. The whole "don't offer, don't refuse" thing has not helped us yet, because she KEEPS ASKING! Sometimes I am so touched out, I just want to stop nursing both of them! I keep bringing up the idea of weaning at 3, and she replies that she doesn't want to be 3. So we carry on, for now. Good luck and hang in there, Mama!!

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    1. Sara, your words brought tears to my eyes. Someone else truly understands what is happening with Meridian and I. She asks all the time!! And yes, I too am feeling very touched out. Sometimes it is so nice to know someone else understands and is going through the same thing. Thank you for the encouragement. Hang in there too and feel free to e-mail me and update me. ((hugs))

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